Beenzino – Memories of My Bed

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Read what Beenzino personally wrote about his bed in Bazaar‘s February 2013 issue.

The bed that is occupying one corner of my room is a tiresome 118 x 208 cm super single size. It looks quite simple, but as if representing the incidents, accidents and memories within it, my bed is always complex and a mess due to scattered garments, blankets and unidentifiable crumbs. How would it be if my bed was located in a public place where anyone could peep in? Aware of people’s gazes, I’d probably decorate it simply and at the same time coolly, as if it was wearing clothes, but I’d definitely be very stressed by it. For me, my bed is existing only in a blind spot where people’s eyes cannot reach, in a very private and most personal space. When I was small and liked to draw by myself, the thing I wanted more than anything was to become a character inside of my drawings. After finishing drawing after several hours, my bed became a kind of stage. Of course I jumped on it! Based on the script I drew in my sketchbook, psycho-like plays started with innocent imagination. I could jump way higher on the bed than on the floor and even if I threw my body on it hard, due to the synergy with the soft bed, the curtains fell successfully.

During elementary and middle school I lived in Munho-ri, Seojong-myeon, Yangpyeong-gun, Gyeonggi-do. There were no “plays on the bed” anymore but I had a new hobby. Before falling asleep, I turned out the light and tilted my head a tiny bit [lying on my bed], then I could excellently see the night sky through the window, which was sufficiently exciting for me. I could imagine and dream endlessly. If my bed hadn’t been next to the window, or the headboard had pointed the other way, I don’t know if I would have ever become interested in the night sky. And looking back now it was astonishingly good luck. The night sky I saw through the window pane back then, the combination of the stars and the moon was very dramatic and I let myself be captivated by it and fell for that sight. Good music was assisting my “ritual before falling asleep” like a sauce [accompanies food]. Honestly, I don’t know how often but I nearly cried a few times. But really unfortunately, that happiness couldn’t last long. Soon, a ‘love hotel’ for “other adults’ more secret rituals” was established behind our house and in the end, only a red neon sign was shining flashily into my room.

So during high school I used to sleep mostly in the classroom with my arms on my table. When my friends were sleeping sweetly, I was clutching the phone and fighting with my girlfriend all night. Because of the continuous quarrelling until dawn, my bed became stained with anger. With coming and going telephone calls and studying, I ignored the college I got accepted into with difficulty and only worked hard at music. At that time, I lied on my bed while writing stories about the “creaking” world and ironically wrote the lyrics of “Always Awake” too, which are about sleep refusal.

Looking at my bed now, [I think] “that’s how it was back then:” I was quite young, didn’t know this and that, was excited and wrote, those sweet times. I thoroughly remember very trivial incidents. The secret memories buried in my bed. It has been quite some time but the after-images are vivid and lingering heavily. And on 15th January 2013, I am still doing “something” on my bed. Text: Beenzino (musician)

[ SOURCE | BEENZINO FANPAGE ]
Please note that the website including the post with the magazine scans has been deleted.

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